"Well you better go to bed now, cause there's going to be a lot of visiting tomorrow, and we all know how fun that is."

    Yes, within the first hour of meeting my little brothers new girlfriend this evening,  these grace filled words had escaped from my mouth.

    There is nothing glamorous about me, and I think that this incident really reveals just a glimpse of a deep darkness that lies within my petrified soul. Amanda is nice! But quiet and nice clashes so oddly with my own self. I come from a line of tall Finnish people. People who say what they want to say, without any flowers or chocolates involved. But that is no excuse for me. Perhaps that is why I am so in love with the sadly deceased, Peter Sellers.


    I'm experimenting with the new set of photos taken last week, seeing how they can take being transferred with paint. I'm not fully pleased nor displeased. I think that means I need to keep working... And I think I need to keep their color. I'm a little bored with black/white prints.

 Doodling

    So who gets lucky enough to play around with wall murals!! Attentions! Ahemms!
:)  If you turn your computer screen around, you will be able to tell better what I plan on doing to a 8x5 ft. piece of wall in a couple days. I want to create a family tree and utilize photo transfers into it. Thus the numbering. I think its going to be a fun week coming up here!

The Lord Sustained Me

     Today as I was running, I was thinking about how perfect it is that I am becoming addicted to blogging. As I've stated before, it all started when a friend from school wondered if I had a website or blog that she could look into. It has now turned into more then that. It's not only an avenue of escape for me, it's also way to keep track of what I am doing with this life. When I have aged and become wise (harhah) I want to document things in a more legit and serious manner. This blog is a sort of journal for me to be able to later on reference back to! I don't have to worry about remembering dates and all that if I simply blog about my day. Perhaps one day it will mean something to someone besides me, but until then, it's a daily/weekly therapy session.

     And so today was difficult. I love Christmas, but I have a very hard time staying in one place for days on end, and being around people all the time. Most of my life is spent alone, with touches of interaction, and so fully blown 24/7 family doesn't always fit the bill of mind. This may sound selfish, and it certainly is. I have been blessed with the ability to concentrate my life persuits these past few years head on and running, without having to give of myself too much.  And I take personal time for granted. Shame, shame.



    It helps to write about the good things of the day for me. Let the bad remain as it is, and focus on what blessings there are in the day.


    So little Zach came home this morning! Love that kid. I had him sit in the chair of honor this evening.

    I also spent a good deal of time dying card stock (gift from Grandma) with coffee. I was going to use it as the paper for Xylene transfers, but I found out this evening that the material was too dense! The ink could simply not penetrate the material. Well, that is my diagnosis until I find out the truth of the matter. Disappointing after so looking forward to it. Try again,... eh. I don't suppose working in 2 degrees helps the process either. :)

     This framed deal is done with Acetone, and it looks better then the almighty Xylene.

    "I lay down and slept; I awoke, for the Lord sustained me. I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people Who have set themselves against me all around." 

    I always took that reference of soldiers and referred it to the wars of my mind. Of course David was running from his son who was after Dad with intentions to kill. And I complain?

Family Photos

    I feel like a rushing train. I can't press down on the brake and take a breath... must  keep working.

    I love family photos, and have been thinking the past while of flirting around with some ideas.
 
   These images hopefully will evolve shortly into Xylene transfers!

   They are taken by shooting my digital at an old kodak duaflex camera lens. It gives them that nice dirty look eh?  I'm really liking the cords lying about.

Measure Twice - Cut Once

Think Twice- Cut Once


     It was Saturday morning, and I was running around from eight-thirty in the morning till eleven at night, trying to finish my Christmas gifts. It was turning out to be a race against time, and I was stressing out a little. Why do I do this to myself. Though I do think that this style of last minute preparation is really inevitable for me. It just like taking a final. I don't quit studying till I enter that classroom, and I don't stop puttering around with gifts till I have to hand them off to their expected receivers."Here, take it. It's the best I could do".  Nineteen framed gifts was the total count up today, and two sore thumbs from sanding and waxing in the garage. I have found a new love for finding and fixing old wooden frames, since being acquainted with a simply waxing procedure back in November.

   But this morning I made a mistake. Grandma came to the house with her box of recipes with the intention of making dinner for all of us. I was working in mom's house alone and everything, including my brain, was a mess and strewn about the house.

    Ever since Grandma made a taco deep dish a few years back for me, she has always kept in mind  that it has been my favorite meal of hers. She would once and a while make it for me if I was home. Well today seemed like a special day and Grandma started talking about making this dish as she sat looking at her recipes at the table. Me being a confirmed gluten intolerante, grandma began to get creative and think of substitutes for the Bisquick mix that was needed for the topping. "We could use oatmeal flower and make our own."I agreed with her! And we could add our own rising ingredients, salt and whatnot to complete the rest. Who needs Bisquick!? So I hurriedly opened the pantry and looked around for the bag of oatmeal flower that mom had recently ground up for the Lefse party this past week. I saw a bag, but it seemed different then the one used previously. "Well, Mom must have ground more oatmeal and put it in a different bag," I thought, not taking seriously even the fact that its contents were a little different looking as well..  I measured out the two cups and gave it to Grandma along with a few eggs that were in the fridge.

Grandma left and I went back to making a mess in the house. Frames and their glass pieces were on the counters in in splendid randomness.

I left Mom's house around six thirty and headed over, across at the field, to eat supper. Still in the process of cooking, we all waited a while in the living room watching a oddly long infomercial to pass the time. 

Dinner was set and Grandpa, Grandma and I sat down to eat. It was really good! Had a touch of sweetness that I found interesting, but I thought this not unusual. Just different. 

Mom and Earl came by later and sat down to also have a bite to eat. It occurred to me now to tell Mom where I found her flour in the pantry and confirm that it was indeed ground oatmeal. Mom seemed confused at what I was saying, but soon it dawned on her what her daughter used instead of wheat. . . chocolate cake mix. I couldn't stop laughing as I sat in the living room listening to Mom and Grandma as the two of them realized the situation.

Now grandma usually find my mistakes funny, but today it was different. "All that work, and I wasted a pound of venison!" I quickly sobered up.

Sigh.... Merry Christmas to me I guess. To all those out there, Chocolate Taco Cake, just might be the next big thing.

Lefse, L&M, and the Promised Land,

This bitter sweet week 

Who knows what lefse is? Isn't it that weird bread/pastry deal that you can buy at the grocers in plastic bag for quite cheap? Isn't it a scandinavian thing? Cause scandinavians eat stuff like that? 

Well Tuesday I was formally introduced to it, and I was also made aware that there are very special tools that are needed in order to make this edible tradition correctly. My mom held a Lefse party and a dear friend of hers showed up with equipment in hand and an apron on. I never knew it until that day, what deep respect I would soon hold in regards to the local L&M store when I learned where one might attain these tools. I kept saying throughout the afternoon, "L&M sells this stuff?" How ridiculously wonderful! They sell everything!

Now the next assignment was to do a photo shoot of Grandma and Grandpa. For the first time in my life, I have never seen Grandma be so ready to undergo to a project like this!

 It is known to all that live on this blessed earth, that special relatives seem to find some kind of satisfaction in mailing out photos during Christmas, showing their persons in rare exotic places, having the greatest time of their life. They are tan, happy and currently ahead of their somber card receivers, as they are currently entering the Promised Land. . . Or perhaps other dear family members find more satisfaction standing by some highly prized item that they have spent most of their life, time and funds on. 

 The first day I went over to Grandma's house for break, she laughing showed me a card in her office, of a couple standing proudly by a very fine piece of driving machinery that looked like it had never been touched by normal people hands. After I looked at the card, she said, "Grandpa and I should stand by that old truck of ours." I readily agreed. And what do you know! It so happened!  Grandpa was (assumingly) told to put on his clean overalls and Watson (my dog) wrapped in a scarf, and very unamused, called our house and told us they were ready for the photo shoot. We quickly got ready and headed out, cameras in hand. 

 Let it be known to all that my dear Grandparents are ready to hit the high roads!  

 I theeenk that I'm done with my mother's wall. I'm not all out loving what I did, but there are certain details that have sparked continual interest. Maybe next year, when I paint over it, those ideas will have matured. Great fun!

Awareness

    In all honesty I was scared to come home. Lot's of personal situations, and the overwhelming fact that I was going to be running around for whole month not knowing what to do with myself, and crashing where I ended up: my sisters, my brothers, my Dads, my Moms' etc... tiring. It was time to pray. And I have been praying for a miracle. And the word that comes to mind is awareness. There is healing when one is aware of the source of pain instead of simply reacting to it.

     The trip wasn't easy. It was twenty hours of Sig time, but I love to travel and I love to drive, so it evened out in the end. The weather is so contrastable to Memphis, that it was almost laughable. I found myself looking out the car windows at a rainy day, as I left, to fourteen inches of snow the further north I drove.

    And I have been surprisingly busy!
I have been blessed to help my brother move and in so doing, have been able to paint a few rooms in the house that he has moved into. YES!

    Now I am continuing to work on  a mural on my mothers wall. I started it spring break but had to leaving it unfinished due to a lack of time. I wasn't really intending to dive back in it so quickly, but since I conveniently printed off a bunch of photos at school before I left, (I drained the printers of their ink) and brought them home with me. I thought, "Why not use them on this?" So I got back to work today.

Acrylic Transfers

             Lots of hanging paper now, but after the paint dries, I can rub all that off.

 I brought my weaving materials with me! Mom's kitchen is full of Signe.

 Little Eli Man has continued to capture my heart.

 I went to see a performance with Grandma on Thursday, that my mom and her friends were putting on at the DAC in Floodwood. We get there and settle into our seats around a table, and soon coffee was offered by a nice woman who worked there. We both readily accepted. After a few minutes of chatting with the folks across the table, Grandma looks at me and says, "We need something to suck on." So she takes out of her purse and old eyeglass case holding Grandpas meds, cough drops and a couple candies.  I love Grandma.  There is no woman more resourceful.

It's been a good first week. I think I shall survive this one yet.